Betcha thought this blog was a lost cause . .. well, in a way, you were right–I may very well be shrugging my shoulders of the whole thing very soon in order to wipe the slate clean and play in a different way without a whole lot of personal clutter, but for those of you who have had my blog tucked away on their RSS feed, first of all, BOO!!! Yes the end of the world is coming and you probably should just take all your life savings to the casino boat and fire away, but in terms of formal endings, this may be the point where the editorturer blog dies peacefully while still pretty much in a sleep state in order to make room something, maybe, a little more pointedly creative.
I made it to the Editor’s intensive in Cincinnati, you know, the event in the spring that I was not able to make due to my Grandmother’s final brave round with ovarian cancer and, in a word, it’s been life-changing . . . perhaps more like life-afirming. Because of the feedback I was given, because I found myself very much vindicated and confirmed by all the things my editor and others around me had to say, I now know, without the shadow of a doubt in my mind, that I can make a writing life work for me. I know what I need to fix. I know what I have is not perfect and that’s ok–despite going into this feeling like if another rewrite was suggested I was just gonna throw my hands up and say all this shit is taking too long, I know exactly what to do and I trust myself enough to be able to handle this task in a timely and professional way.
My dayjob has reached the height of it’s ugliness. I have an opportunity to take a part time job that pays much less per hour but I also have a cushion. Now is the time to move.
One chance. One chance is all you get. One life to live, so many opportunities for happiness, and money has yet to make me happy in a satisfactory way. Being at that conference and being this close to being fired from work is making me feel very manic and wild like a someone free falling to their death, but what a wonderful feeling . . . what a crazy, wonderful, empowering feeling it is, especially when someone removed from you, removed from your regular circle of friends, family and other writers, tells you that it’s time to stop sitting on the golden egg.
I’m keeping this short and sweet today because I’m a little short on time, but will be keeping subscribers of this page updated as to my next move. Happy Monday all!
